It's a shame that I see myself all too clearly sometimes in the mirror, and all the stuff that comes out characterizes everything that I'm not supposed to be living for. Like today, I got frustrated with my partner when we were doing an ELEC 276 assignment, and I got snappy a few times. I know it's not what a Christian should do, and I know that deep down it's not something I really wanted to do either, but I let go and went ahead and sinned even though really I could've stopped it. It's these times I guess that I gotta watch it, when it's all to easy to let go and not care anymore. I feel so unmotivated these days now that it's the last stretch of classes, bringing glory to him is really just a hope. Not really striving for it, which I should be.

At the same time, God has been teaching me what humility is. Not how humble I am, but how humble that I should be as I realize how really inadequate I am for my role as a student and in other facets of life.

3"Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
5Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
6Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
7Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
Matthew 5:3-10

I really don't know what else to say, it's something I'm trying to learn, and something that God is teaching, but I have a thick head, and so it's not very easy for him to do it. Yah, I pray that I'll gain some perspective and be able to refocus, not merely buffetting in the wind.