Those who know me, know that when I talk about the Church in North America, sometimes I can get quite cynical. Sometimes, I can get so frustrated. Recently, God has allowed me to observe and witness many things. I have clearly heard and rejoiced with those whom He has given passions to, and at the same time, I been disappointed with lukewarmness and apathy towards what God desires to do.

It has and will be a time of sorting out, a time to sit down and seek what is it that God wants me to do. What is it that I have a passion for. Well, I know for a fact what God has given me a passion for in the past, and as far as I know, they are still kicking around. Perhaps it is more of knowing how it applies here, and that I am quite delighted to see that my heart is once again getting tugged. That once again there are those sleepless nights and times when I toss and turn thinking about why things have to be a certain way, and what God wants me to do, if anything.

And it is strangely comforting that I am beginning to see a glimpse of what God is showing me. I have no idea where it all leads to now, because I really need to sort out my thoughts before Him. But, I can say, that through what He has given me the opportunity to be apart of, to observe, and through others He has placed around me, there are things on my mind that will not quiet themselves. And so, perhaps, this is a good a time as any to once again figure out what He will have me to do. Meanwhile, I'm enjoying the ride, and wanting to understand more of His heart.

¹Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual[a] act of worship. ²Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Romans 12:1-2